Adoption

So some of you know, it's a pretty good chance that Jeff and i can't have kids, if we end up with a kid it will be a Miracle! We have looked into foster care but when i went to talk with the lady she told me out front "if you are looking to adopt than this isn't the place for you." (which is understandable, but just rubbed me the wrong way i guess) So that really turned me off on doing foster care. So then we started looking to just adopt we looked at LDS Family Services, you have to be married at least 2 years though. Jeff went to all this work trying to get the information but it seemed like it was taking WAY too long and we haven't been married 2 years and so it turned me off once again. Well, i am now starting to look into it again and i was looking at people's profiles that are looking to adopt and it really bugs me to find people that already have a few kids that they didn't have to adopt and then now are trying to adopt, i don't get it. I am so depressed over it, i want to be blessed with a baby and i just feel like i will never be able to get one, i see so many young people that are having kids that aren't married, that don't even really want a kid but made a pack with their friends that they would all get pregnant together, and i just get so mad to found out that they are able to have one and i can't. I just really wish some times that i knew why it's not time for me to have a child. i know it has to be some kind of challenge i have to deal with, i just wish i knew what/why we have to. I look at people who haven't always made the best choices getting to have kids, and here i am (i feel like i have made all the right choices in my life) and can't have a child. i dont get it.